Essays on arranged marriages in india

For a girl, it is during her graduation or early twenties; for a boy, it is after he is 'settled', with a decent job and consistent earnings.


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If no such person exists, the sponsor begins the process of identifying suitable candidates. This is usually done via an intermediary matchmaker who has a social reputation for maintaining discretion and brokering successful weddings. The matchmaker is often an elderly socialite who is liked and widely connected to many families.

In some regions, specific professions are associated with matchmaking. For instance, in many parts of North India and Pakistan, the local barber or nai was a frequent go-between. These considerations vary but can include.

Arranged Marriages in India Essay - Words | Bartleby

Matrimonial websites [28] frequently use some of these factors to enable prospective matches. These items are usually returnable if the match does not proceed: In those scenarios, families customarily cooperate to eliminate any trace of a matchmaking conversation between them. If the prospective partners express a desire to meet or if the families are enthusiastic about a potential match, it is customary for the prospective groom's family to visit the prospective bride's family.

It is traditional for the boy's family to arrive with the boy and be seated with the entire girl's family except the girl, who then makes a dramatic entrance dressed in fine clothes, often bringing tea and refreshments. This practice is sometimes called "seeing the girl" and has been attacked by some Indian and Pakistani feminists as a classic instance of gender-bias and the objectification of women. The families usually part after this initial meeting without any commitment made by either side and with the expectation that they will confer separately and send word through the matchmaker should they be interested in pursuing matters.

These meetings are understood to be non-exclusive, i.

Example of an Arranged Marriage Essay

There is an expectation of total confidentiality. If there is interest from both sides, the matchmaker passes the word to them. If the families are unfamiliar with each other or live in areas far apart, they will frequently launch inquiries through their social and kin networks, attempting to gather as much independent information as possible about the prospective partner.

Since urban Indian nuclear families often lack these extensive networks, many private detective agencies have begun to offer "matrimonial investigation services" since the s, which investigate the personal and professional histories of a prospective spouse for a fee. Once there is mutual agreement between the prospective bride and groom that they would like to marry, and no red flags have emerged about either party in the inquiries conducted formally or informally, the other prospective spouses are declined and their photographs and other documents returned.

Families usually attempt to maintain a high level of cordiality in these interactions, often invoking the idea of sanjog predestined relationship, roughly equivalent to the idea that " marriages are made in heaven " to defuse any sense of rancor or rejection. An engagement ceremony or a pre-engagement ceremony such as roka follows.

In urban areas, the future spouses are often expected to go out on dates and develop a romantic relationship in the period between their engagement and their wedding.

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Though dating may not be socially permissible, nonetheless the couple may talk over the phone. In India, marriage is thought to be for life, [37] and the divorce rate is extremely low. Only 1. From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia. An advertisement for an online partner finding company, Hyderabad, India. Finding a match is easier than finding a parking space, Chennai, India.


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It was widely expected that the custom of "arranged marriage," so called, would decline as India modernized and as an individualistic ethos took root Alasingaperumal, , In ancient times, when the country was governed by Hindu kings, the Swayamvara system of marriage was very common. It is the system of free, choice by the maiden of a husband Hindu traditions In trying to better understand why most young, highly educated women I have known in Bhubaneswar continued to prefer arranged marriages over love marriages The swayamvara system of later times was, thus, foreshadowed in the Vedic times.

Gandharva marriage, which is also part of the orthodox system This king's Gandharva marriage with Cakuntala, which is well-known especially through Kalidasa's drama, is a celebrated example Narada states without hesitation that this kind of marriage belongs to all castes alike The Manusmriti tended to lower women's status and deprived her of her traditional status in a variety of ways In the Muslim Middle East, bounded by Pakistan on the east, Turkey on the north, the Sudan on the south, and Morocco and Western Sahara on the west, early arranged marriage remains common A relevant part of history has been influenced.

Also India is known to have one of the lowest divorce rates in the world. This evidence suggests that the matter is more complex than it may seem at first glance and I will be looking at some of the advantages of arranged marriage and reasons why, to this day, this.

Arranging a Marriage in India Serena Nanda Arranged marriages in Indian society have been the norm for many centuries. Even today, an overwhelming majority of Indian people have their married arranged by their parents, or respected family members. As American we never really contemplate the idea of having someone choose our life-long partner.

We believe that everyone has the right to choose who they want to spend their lived with. Although I believe that we should be free to make our own choices I also can see what the advantages and disadvantages of an arranged …show more content…. They wanted her family to have a good relationship with her and expected her to be very modest yet well educated. Many young men and women in India believe that arranged marriages are good for them because they have the ability to focus on school and also to focus on who they are and what they want to do.

There will be no mystery and no romance. Here we have the whole married life to get to know and love our husbands. Show More. Read More. Popular Essays.

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Arranged Marriage Essays (Examples)

Open Document. The specifics of arranged marriages vary, depending on if one is Hindu or Muslim. The Child Marriage Restraint Act of states that the legal age for marriage is 18 for females, and 21 for males,with most females being married by 24 and most males being married by their late twenties McDonald. However, many children, age 15 and 16 are married within a cultural context, with these marriages being neither void or voidable under Hindu or Muslim religious law, as long as the marriage is not consummated until the legal age of 18 for females and 21 for males.

In the Muslim faith, it is the responsibility of the parents to provide for the education and the marriage of their children. The actual marriage ceremony nikah consists of both individuals being asked if they are in agreement for marriage. The paying of a dowry is culturally optional, but legally unlawful. If the daughter remains unmarried, she is considered a spinster, who brings shame upon her family, and she is considered a burden. A woman also suffers this fate if she is separated or single past 24 years old Stein.

For more information, see Divorce in India. Marriage is a sacramental union in the Hindu faith. Most females are married before puberty, with almost all girls being married before 16, while most boys are married before the age of 22 Gupta However, couples normally do not consummate the marriage until three years after the marriage ceremony The legal age for marriages is 18 for females and 21 for males McDonald.

Like Muslim arranged marriages, the Hindu culture uses a matchmaker to help find possible matches.

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Once a match is found and arrangements met, the two families meet to discuss dowry, time, and location of the wedding, the birth stars of the boy and girl, and education McDonald. During this time, the males of the family huddle in the center of the room, while the perspective couple sits at the periphery of the room and exchange glances. If the two families agree, they shake hands and set a date for the wedding McDonald. Most Hindu pre-wedding ceremonies take place on acuta , the most spiritual day for marriages.

The ceremony often takes place early in the morning, with the male leading the female around a fire punit seven times. During this time she is not allowed to interact with the males of the house, because she is considered pure until the marriage is consummated. This period of marriage can range from three to six years McDonald. The traditional arranged marriage matchmaker is called a nayan Prakasa The matchmaker is normally a family friend or distant relative who serves as a neutral go-between when families are trying to arrange a marriage.

Some families with marriageable age children may prefer not to approach possible matches with a marriage proposal because communication between families could break down, and could result in accidental disrespect between the two families Ahmad Matchmakers can serve two functions: marriage scouts, who set out to find possible matches, and as negotiators, people who negotiate between families. As a scout and negotiator, a family sends the nayan into the community to seek possible matches. Once a match is found, the matchmaker notifies his or her clients and arranges communication through him or her.

Communication is facilitated through the nayan until some type of agreement is met. Depending on the region, an actual meeting between the families takes place, to finalize the marriage agreement, while also allowing the couple to see each other Once a marriage agreement is met, the nayan may be asked to assist in the marriage preparations: jewelry and clothing buying, ceremonial set-up, and notification of the marriage to the community Ahmad The nayan usually receives no pay for his or her services, but may receive gifts: clothing, food, and assistance in farming from both families for the services they provide Newspapers, the Internet, television ads, and social conventions serve as the modern nayan Prakasa Indian families in metropolitan cities use the mass media as go-between as a way of bridging cultural gaps, in areas where there may be a small Indian population.

The demand for dowries spread to the lower caste, and became a prestige issue, with the system becoming rigid and expensive. Prakasa notes five purposes of the dowry: 1 provides an occasion for people to boost their self esteem through feasts and displays of material objects; 2 makes alliances with the families of similar status; 3 helps prevent the breakup of family property; 4 gets a better match for daughters; 5 furnishes daughters with some kind of social and economic security